Sometimes spiritual challenges come from the most unlikely sources. I'm not big on the whole "Progressive Christian" movement. In fact, "not big" is an understatement. My reasons for feeling that way aren't the issue at the moment. I just don't care for the theology espoused by the movement. But I have to confess that I came across a Progressive Christian line that made me start doing some thinking about prayer. It said something along the lines of "prayer is just a passive aggressive way of telling God we think He's lazy." Hmmm.
"Passive-aggressive" basically means to show aggression in indirect ways; to hide aggression behind a thin veneer of non-aggression. Some believe it's a personality disorder. Others - such as Marxists - believe it's a rational response to a situation in which direct and active resistance for one reason or another is impossible. I'm no psychologist, but I suspect that it could be either, depending on the circumstances, although I've seen the Marxist concept differentiated and referred to not as passive-aggressive but as passive-resistant. The term "passive-aggressive" was apparently coined by the US military to describe soldiers who made clear their unhappiness at obeying certain orders even as they obeyed them to the letter. So, how does prayer fit in?
One thing I have noted with some people is that prayers can sometimes resemble little more than a shopping list. "God, I want this and this and this and this. Give it to me. Now. Amen." I can see how that might fit the definition of passive-aggressive. The fact that all a person is doing is asking God for things is an expression of dissatisfaction, but clearly someone who believes in God can't actively do anything about it, so they hide their dissatisfaction and anger behind a seemingly pious life of prayer. They pray a lot. They look faithful and committed, but really behind the veneer of piousness is a lot of anger at God for not doing things the way they think things should be done. It's a little bit like the spouse who constantly says to his or her partner "I love you dearly - now change." And I know more than a few people who didn't really marry the person they loved - they married the person who was available on the assumption that given enough time they could force that person to become the person they love. Some people's prayers seem like that. There's even a biblical basis for it, I suppose. Abraham bargaining with God for the people of Sodom; Moses doing the same for the Hebrews. Both are upset that God is going to do something that they see as un-Godlike, but rather than openly expressing their anger, they have "holy" conversations now considered Scripture. So maybe it's not passive-aggressive; maybe it's passive-resistant? You assume you can't beat God, so you find less direct ways of telling God "You're wrong." Maybe Marx was on the ball here. To be perfectly honest, though, I kind of prefer the example of Job, who didn't hide behind a veneer but who let God know bluntly that he was angry, or Paul - who pleaded with God to take away his thorn in the flesh, or - of course - Jesus, who pleaded "Father, take this cup from me." They laid it on the line, but in the end they accepted whatever God's will was. In the end, what real choice do we have? It's just a matter of how we react to God's will, especially when that divine will seems to affect us very directly and personally.
Of course, we're all going to have petitions to bring to God in prayer, and sometimes we're going to come to God at times when we're really not happy with what God seems to be doing. Maybe even there will be times when we think we could do a better job. We're human after all! And prayer probably shouldn't just be a big cosmic cuddle time. If there's something we desperately need, we're probably going to ask for it. Even if it's something we just want really badly we might ask for it. But rather than just asking - maybe we should be honest with God about how we're feeling (especially since God knows anyway!) So if we're hurting, we should express it. And if we're angry we should let it out. Because God can take it - and it's in the resolution of these things that we finally gain what we really should be looking for through prayer - which is an abiding and life-affirming relationship with God.
Paul - after all his struggles with God and with himself and with his opponents and with the churches he loved that could frustrate him so much - could still eventually write "I have learned to be content." Contentedness is the opposite of passive-aggressive, I think. If we're content we can express all our feelings and wants and needs to God, but at the same time still be thankful toward God - because, while it would always be nice to have "more," what we do have comes from God. Ultimately I think that's what prayer does. If we pray sincerely, from the depths of our souls, we find contentedness; we find relief from turmoil; we find peace.
Maybe the Progressive Christians are right to some extent. Maybe there is an element of passive-aggressiveness in our prayers sometimes. Maybe behind a veneer of piousness we are actually telling God what to do because we don't think God has done it right. But hopefully not all the time. Hopefully, from time to time, our prayers burst forth in praise and thanksgiving and gratitude. Hopefully, ultimately, our times of prayer leave us grateful rather than grasping. Hopefully.
No comments:
Post a Comment