My contribution to this week's In Port News "I've Been Thinking" column:
As of November 21 I turn 50 years old. That's an intriguing birthday. Half a century. It's not particularly old, but then again ... Well, maybe it explains why I prefer to think of myself as two 25s rather than as 50. But it is one of those milestone birthdays that pretty much force us to take stock of our lives. Have things worked out the way we wanted them to? Do we have regrets? Are there things we would have done differently if we had been given the chance?
In one sense I suppose that the answer to those questions is always "yes." Who among us can look back at the whole scope of our lives and actually say that everything has been perfect. That we've never slipped up, hurt anyone, made a bad choice. We've all done that. Christians do those things as much as anyone. A long time ago Paul wrote that "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." Some people look at some of the situations we Christians get ourselves into and they immediately cry "hypocrite!" Well, only if we hold others to a different standard than we hold ourselves to. I personally understand fully what Paul was talking about. Is there anyone among us who hasn't from time to time ignored the little voice of conscience in our heads and gone ahead and - in Paul's words - done the thing we do not want to do? Probably not. If anyone reading this can say that, then - well - you're a better person that I am!
Thinking about this reminds me, of course, of the wonders of God's grace. "Grace" of course is a free gift. It is that which is given without condition, simply out of the generosity of the giver. In the case of grace, the give ris God. I've noticed over the years that there are so many people who want to put limits on the grace of God. To many it becomes conditional on this or that: good works, belief, or any number of things. But to put a condition on grace is to deny grace. Grace has no conditions; it's just grace. God extends his grace to us, as it is in God's power to do. It's not even in our power to accept or reject it. Grace is simply ours because God has given it to us. I've sometimes likened God's gift of grace to a person who anonymously slips a hundred dollars into my mailbox in the middle of the night. Once I find it, it's mine to do with as I please. I have many options. I can use it selfishly, for my own purposes; I can use it generously to help others; I can simply hide it away somewhere and never touch it; I can turn it over to the police. But what I can't do is give it back to the person who's given it to me. It's the same with the grace God bestows on each of us. We can't reject it or give it back, because it's been given to us. All we can do is use it - wisely or not. And sometimes, we'll all choose the "not." Just as Paul said, "what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." As to the consequences for using God's grace unwisely? They, of course, are for God to decide.
Our responsibility and our privilege is simply to proclaim the existence of grace, given to the world in the form of Jesus Christ. We do that not only (and perhaps not even primarily) in words, but also in how we relate to others. We do not judge or condemn anyone. We simply proclaim God's grace and we live the love of Jesus.
My 50 years haven't been perfect. But they also haven't been a waste of time! I've had the chance to learn a lot about the grace of God in that half century, and I still have a lot to learn about it! I'm hoping that all of us take some time to reflect and be thankful for the grace of God given to us all - because, truly, none of us are perfect, and all of us sometimes do those things we know we should not do, and we fail to do the things we know we should do. But God grants us a new start. Always!
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